This is a little nugget from way back in my Florida days...
One night after a busy dinner shift a co-worker and I were standing near the front entrance to the restaurant enjoying the warm evening breeze. As we chatted, a couple walked by on their way out and the man cheerfully said "Have good night guys!" When they were about five steps away my buddy muttered "Don't tell me what kind of f-ing night to have!" He said it as a joke meant for my ears only, but the couple heard him! The man stormed back in and asked for the manager. Needless to say my buddy was fired. To this day every time a customer, or anyone for that matter, tells me to have a good night, guess what I say to myself with a little smile?
Monday, August 27, 2012
Monday, August 20, 2012
Care for some cream with your coffee...?
It never fails to astound me the downright random and odd things that customers actually say! Case in point:
I had a table of four guys the other night; just a night out with the boys, away from their wives. They had shared a couple of bottles of wine so they were feeling good, laughing and just being dudes. At the end of the meal I offer the customary coffee and dessert. One of the guys asks for coffee so I offer him cream and sugar. To which he replies "I'd love some breast milk with that. Got any back there?" I was a little taken aback but smiled and said "Sorry, we're fresh out" and walked away to get their coffees. When I returned, the guy, seeing how he was clearly getting somes laughs from his buddies, continues "So no breast milk huh? C'mon theres got to be some hot young thing in here somewhere we could tap!" I smiled weakly and said "Umm..I'm leave that up to you sir." Fueled by his friends laughter he points at an attractive lady sitting two tables away with her date and says "What about her, she's got a nice set, we could probably get something out of those!" The woman glanced over uncomfortably but appeared not to have known what this moron was actually talking about. At this point I was out of replies and just left the boys to their odd joke.
I had a table of four guys the other night; just a night out with the boys, away from their wives. They had shared a couple of bottles of wine so they were feeling good, laughing and just being dudes. At the end of the meal I offer the customary coffee and dessert. One of the guys asks for coffee so I offer him cream and sugar. To which he replies "I'd love some breast milk with that. Got any back there?" I was a little taken aback but smiled and said "Sorry, we're fresh out" and walked away to get their coffees. When I returned, the guy, seeing how he was clearly getting somes laughs from his buddies, continues "So no breast milk huh? C'mon theres got to be some hot young thing in here somewhere we could tap!" I smiled weakly and said "Umm..I'm leave that up to you sir." Fueled by his friends laughter he points at an attractive lady sitting two tables away with her date and says "What about her, she's got a nice set, we could probably get something out of those!" The woman glanced over uncomfortably but appeared not to have known what this moron was actually talking about. At this point I was out of replies and just left the boys to their odd joke.
Sunday, August 12, 2012
An actual exchange...
This is an actual exchange (condensed) that I had just the other day with a female customer of mine:
Her: Does this chicken pasta dish have very many vegetables in it?
Me: Not really, I mean it does have some peppers, tomatoes and onions but the dominant ingredients are pasta and chicken. Why, do you not want vegetables? I can have that done for you.
Her: Oh no, it's ok. I don't like vegetables but as long as there is not too many, I'll be ok.
Me: Are you sure, because it's really no problem?
Her: No it's fine, thanks. Oh, and I'll take a Ceasar salad.
Me: Umm..isn't that a vegetable?
Her: No, not really, it's a salad.
Me: Ok...
Later as she and her guest appeared to be finished I went over to clear their plates and found "Mrs salad-isn't-a-vegetable" had left almost all of the chicken and cream sauce in the bottom of the dish. So it continued..
Me: May I clear that for you?
Her: Sure, I'm done. It's mostly vegetables anyways.
Me: Actually it's very little veggies, it looks like pretty much all chicken to me. (To which her guest thankfully agreed).
Her: Oh yea, well I don't really like chicken.
Me: Ok, I wish you had told me that when I took your order and you were asking me about the CHICKEN pasta. I could have had it changed for you.
Her: Well..I like it sometimes.
After this I was pretty much out of replies having realized I was speaking with a very "different" person. She was quite nice and normal in all other respects, just a little odd.
Her: Does this chicken pasta dish have very many vegetables in it?
Me: Not really, I mean it does have some peppers, tomatoes and onions but the dominant ingredients are pasta and chicken. Why, do you not want vegetables? I can have that done for you.
Her: Oh no, it's ok. I don't like vegetables but as long as there is not too many, I'll be ok.
Me: Are you sure, because it's really no problem?
Her: No it's fine, thanks. Oh, and I'll take a Ceasar salad.
Me: Umm..isn't that a vegetable?
Her: No, not really, it's a salad.
Me: Ok...
Later as she and her guest appeared to be finished I went over to clear their plates and found "Mrs salad-isn't-a-vegetable" had left almost all of the chicken and cream sauce in the bottom of the dish. So it continued..
Me: May I clear that for you?
Her: Sure, I'm done. It's mostly vegetables anyways.
Me: Actually it's very little veggies, it looks like pretty much all chicken to me. (To which her guest thankfully agreed).
Her: Oh yea, well I don't really like chicken.
Me: Ok, I wish you had told me that when I took your order and you were asking me about the CHICKEN pasta. I could have had it changed for you.
Her: Well..I like it sometimes.
After this I was pretty much out of replies having realized I was speaking with a very "different" person. She was quite nice and normal in all other respects, just a little odd.
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